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Hi Beth, I'm 38 and I too live with my parents and like you, I always get a funny look when I tell people that. Just wanted to let you know that you're not the only one this happens to. My parents need me too, as they are getting older, plus I tried living by myself for a while and I hated it. I've come to the conclusion that as long as I'm happy, it's nobody else's business what I do (or don't do).
ps....You're Sheltie is a cutie! I have a four-legged baby also, a Chihuahua named Holly. Take her over a man anyday. She's always glad to see me
OMG...I can't believe it.....*drops to knees...arms outstretched*
I am 38 and I, too, live with my mommy!!! Thank God there's somebody in the world besides me!!
I don't make lots of money and my dad died when I was 2. So I just live with Mom. She likes it because she'd be lonely otherwise and it saves me money. We get along great...we always have. But people look at you like you are a loser when they find out you live with your mother.
Now there is "no womb at the inn"
The looks do bug me though. When people find out I've had a hysterectomy, they look all horrified and apologetic. It just draws more attention to it. I don't go out out of my way to make people feel like idiots, but they seem to stumble into it themselves. I'm at peace with my choices and happy with my life.
I know how you feel. I had a hysterectomy on my 30th birthday. People look like "Oh you poor thing, you'll never be able to have kids". Yeah oh well. The way I see it is...without the hysterectomy, I would be dead. I almost did'n't make it through the surgery and the next few days. So to me it was a good thing I had the surgery...even though I don't recall my 30th birthday and when I lost 3/4 of my blood, I began hallucinating and saw spiders crawling all over my room and made friends and family kill them. I don't remember this..I only remember 1 white spider crawling in and out of my straw. God plays vicious tricks....why did it have to be spiders?? I'm terrified of spiders!! LOL
God plays vicious tricks....why did it have to be spiders?? I'm terrified of spiders!! LOL
What a nightmare! I'm terrified of spiders, too, so I can relate! My hysterectomy went quite smoothly, so I'm happy about that. It would have been nice to have my problems solved another way, but I love the freedom I have now having had a hysterectomy. Its wonderful!
I don't see my lack of desire to have children as something wrong with me. I think of it as a blessing, actually. It would be heartbreaking to be in this position and really want them. I feel like I've been saved a lot of pain.
People just need to learn to accept and appreciate the life choices other's make ... none of our lives are better than the others because we have kids, or don't have kids, or have a man, or have a lot of adventures. Celebrate the life that you have & own it! - that's what its about.
__________________ Darci "Awww, you guys made me Ink!"
"Creativity is a continual surprise" (Ray Bradbury)
I love the "Dh is not allowed 100 yards" comment! I tell people the truth...I'm just too selfish to be a parent. I do not want to spend my Saturday mornings at a hockey rink, or soccor field. i do not want to spend my hard-earned money on braces. I like staying up late and sleeping in. I like eating cheetos for supper. I do not want to share my toys.
I teach pre-school, so I get my fix of children from 7:30-5:30 Monday to Friday. I love kids, I love teaching. I also love my nights and weekends to myself!
I applaud the parents who selflessly take their kids to sports events on the weekends, stay up all night with their sick kids, sit through 2 hours of barney on ice. Some people are meant to be parents. Some (like me) are meant to teach other people's children!
Amen! LOL I'm single and have no children and at this point, I wouldn't have it any other way! I love being able to go anywhere I want and not have to bundle up a screaming baby or find a babysitter, etc. I have an adorable nephew who is 14 months and a beautiful niece who is 2 months and that is MORE than enough for me! LOL
Will my Single Childless Sisters hold up your Mono Adhesive and repeat after me... "I will scrap and stamp whatever I like, when I like, and don't have to justify it to anyone"!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Amen!
I'm not married and have no children. I would be content if and when God blesses me with a husband and children; however, I'm content now too PLUS I don't have to check my schedule with anyone AND I can spend as much $$$$ as I want on stamping without getting any funny looks!
__________________ Ingrid
"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." - Eleanor Roosevelt
Michelle I LOVE the shoes page and left a comment.
Thanks! I appreciate that!
I've gotten over it and don't care if my albums are used for firewood when I die. They give me joy here and now, thats whats important.
I feel the same way!
Hubbie and I are open to adopting but can't afford it at the moment. We're only 30 so we do still have time to become parents if that is in our plan.
I don't understand. Do you have to pay for adoption in the US? Or are you speaking about adopting from a foreign country? i know my parents did not "pay" for me. in fact, i think that would be illegal here. If you go through the Children's Aid society, there are a lot of children in foster care looking for adoption. My aunt has been a foster parent for 34 years. She adopted Kyle 18 years ago. She fostered him from the time he was born, then decided to adopt him when he was 1. There was no cost.
Sometimes if someone asks about kids...I slap myself on the forehead and say " Shoot, I knew I forgot to do something!" I don't think it is selfish not to want to have kids....it's the having them and then not taking care of them that is selfish....saw too many kids like that when I was teaching....of course also saw many happily parented kids ( one and two parents and more parents as well).
Plus if you go out and leave your furbabies at home in the basement, they ususally don't arrest you....mine however get to sleep in the bed.
I too am not married, broke off my long term relationship (6 years) in September as he was beginning to treat me terribly and who needs that?
I have no children and am 41 years old
I've been scrapbooking since January 1997 (plenty of nieces, nephews, vacations and life fill the pages) and stamping since 2003. I feel the oddest when I go to weekend crops and everyone else gets calls from/or makes calls to their kids and spouses. No one bothers me, and at home I can leave a project on the table for days .. it won't bother anyone
I'm 31 and have been happily married for 9 years with no kids - although DH acts like one most days! I tried scrapbooking, but got really sick of pictures of my cat, which seem to be the only pictures DH and I ever remember to take. lol! I'm a card maker at heart, though. DH loves my hobby because it makes me happy and gives him time to play computer games. It also gives me something to do while he's working long hours and trying to go to school full time.
I think it's great meeting everyone with similar interests! I love knowing I'm not the only person who scramps without kids. Every scrap thing I attend it's about the kids. I'd like some of them to be more about travel! That would be fun. I love lots of pics there!
I'm having a good time laughing here. A travel scrap day would be fun. I'm hoping to travel more now that we are financially more stable, something kids would throw so far off for me. I'm very content in my life and I hate being made to feel like something is wrong with me for not wanting to birth a child. I also have high blood pressure, so the thought of getting PG, scares the daylights out of me. Plus I slept from 10 pm - 8:30 am today, woohoo!!
I've been on SCS for quite a while now, and I started a thread called The Single Life Without Children, which got put into support groups. The link to that thread is Forums at Splitcoaststampers and you're all welcome to join us over there. We go through really active spurts and really slow spurts.
Just so you know, though, I'm not trying to take away from this thread. It seems to be going really well. I just wanted to let you all know about it in case anyone here's interested.
When Jessrose21 mentioned this thread, I made up my mind to come over and say hi! I hope you don't mind me popping in here and saying hi. Hope you don't mind if I come back and see you again.
Happy New Year, all!
__________________ Michelle
�If I didn't have spiritual faith, I would be a pessimist. I've read the last page in the Bible. It's all going to turn out all right." - Billy Graham
People just need to learn to accept and appreciate the life choices other's make ... none of our lives are better than the others because we have kids, or don't have kids, or have a man, or have a lot of adventures. Celebrate the life that you have & own it! - that's what its about.
I've read through most of the comments and this pretty well sums up the way I feel. Someone wrote that she was asked what she scraps if she doesn't have kids! What an odd question. The scrapbook industry and the SAHMs didn't invent scrapbooks! I started my first one in the 60s when I was a teen. I guess some would view that as a waste of time if it wasn't for or about my children. That scrapbook is invaluable to me right now.
I am single and childless. So was a great aunt I knew and loved growing up. I would give anything to have a scrapbook of her life. But, as someone said, keeping a journal or scrapbook of your own life for your own enjoyment is enough of a reason! My scrapbooks/photo albums are a record of vacations, concerts, museums, plays, and restaurants, 4 cats, 2 nephews, 2 brothers and a sister-in-law, aunts and cousins, my house, my car - you name it!
Your life is unique - that makes it worth documenting!
__________________ Cheryl "Mom" to Jazz & Cubby bungalowdays
I wish I could think of some good comeback for those people who say "You're how old and you've never been married!" or they'll say "So when are you getting married?" Any suggestions?
My favorites are:
We're waiting on his parole to marry,
or
If I marry, I will have to give up my $10 million trust! (my favorite)
Married 10 years, no kids (due to endometriosis). I got the creative bug from my mom - however, unlike her, I can't draw or paint a lick! So, stamping has become my artistic outlet. We're hoping to adopt in the near future, but for now I'm enjoying being in control of my free time. The only problem is, I really don't have an excuse for not using all those stamps and accessories I "had to have" more often - maybe I need to try that stamper's block vaccine Melissa recommended. I'm sure hubby will love that! ; )
HI, Gals!! 27 and single here. I am glad that I found this thread. It's nice to have friends who are in the same "Boat" as it were. All (yes all) of my friends here are married. That makes it really hard. I live in a small community, and I'm not into the whole bar/club/dancing scene, so that makes it pretty hard. This website/stamping has really become a lifesaver for me. I love stamping, and I love all of the friends that I'm meeting here.
And just for self validation
"Hi, my name is Melinda, I'm single, and NO....THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH ME!!!"
Quote:
Originally Posted by morebooks
My favorites are:
We're waiting on his parole to marry,
or
If I marry, I will have to give up my $10 million trust! (my favorite)
"He got stuck rock climbing and is waiting for someone to come rescue him."
Hi, Melinda - and everyone! The day will come when we won't have to explain not being married. The statistic just came in that for the first time there are more single women than married in the US! This includes singles by choice, by divorce, by outliving their spouses - as well as single but living with a significant other! So, now what's 'normal'?
__________________ Cheryl "Mom" to Jazz & Cubby bungalowdays
Married here but no human babies...just fur-children....I love them, they don't talk back and they love unconditionally...we do want human babies. We have been married 2 years on February 5th and just are not ready to not be selfish anymore. Both DH and I are very independent, both have our sets of friends and both enjoy coming and going as we please! We are also not sure if we will be able to have children of our own...in which case, when we are ready, we will look into adoption! But for now, it is him and me and 2 dogs and 2 cats...and I get to stamp and scrapbook whenever i want!!!
__________________ Rebekah ---Remember: People only rain on your parade because they're jealous of your sun and tired of their shade
I've read through most of the comments and this pretty well sums up the way I feel. Someone wrote that she was asked what she scraps if she doesn't have kids! What an odd question. The scrapbook industry and the SAHMs didn't invent scrapbooks! I started my first one in the 60s when I was a teen. I guess some would view that as a waste of time if it wasn't for or about my children. That scrapbook is invaluable to me right now.
Cheryl, hi, btw! What you said above was great! I don't understand why people think that the only ones who have anything worth scrapping about are those with children. My mom had children and never scrapped. I have a single without children friend who scraps all the time, and she has many books. She doesn't even have what most would call an extraordinary life, but she loves to keep track of her life through pictures and scrapbooks.
I just don't get some people's attitudes when it comes to those who're single and without children. We are people of value, whether we've produced other people or not, and whether we're with someone else or not.
__________________ Michelle
�If I didn't have spiritual faith, I would be a pessimist. I've read the last page in the Bible. It's all going to turn out all right." - Billy Graham
Married two years, stamper for 15 years, childless by choice. I knew my husband was the one for me when he built me a beautiful stamping desk for my birthday when we were first dating. When I was still single and living in Michigan, I had a wonderful circle of also-never-married friends who I could stamp and scrap with. My marriage brought along a move to Ohio, but my single sistahs are carrying on the tradition! Go Amigas!!
Hello everyone!
I've been enjoying this thread a lot. I am also single...no kids. I'm not against the idea of getting married or having kids, I've always wanted to. But there was no way I was going to settle just so I wouldn't "run out of time." I hope to meet Mr. Right someday, but at this point, he will really have to be Mr. Right! Just like several other people have said--I bought my own house, decorated it the way I wanted to, have complete control over the TiVo, have an office and a stamp room, get to go where I want to on vacation (convention, anyone?), and can eat Ben and Jerry's for dinner if I want to.
I have 2 brothers, and they do not have kids either (one is still single, the married one is childless by choice). This is killing my dad. He just wants a grandchild before he dies (he often says in a mournful voice). He recently asked me when I was going to have kids and I replied that I wasn't married, didn't even have a boyfriend right now. He replied, "You don't have to be married to have kids." I about hit the floor--this is my conservative, Rush Limbaugh, GWB-worshipping father. He's getting desperate!
Hello everyone!
I've been enjoying this thread a lot. I am also single...no kids. I'm not against the idea of getting married or having kids, I've always wanted to. But there was no way I was going to settle just so I wouldn't "run out of time." I hope to meet Mr. Right someday, but at this point, he will really have to be Mr. Right!
Katy, that's exactly how I feel! I could've married at a couple points, but the men just weren't right, and I'd much rather stay single than marry the wrong man.
Just think of it this way, oh, single girls! We are Unclaimed Blessings!
__________________ Michelle
�If I didn't have spiritual faith, I would be a pessimist. I've read the last page in the Bible. It's all going to turn out all right." - Billy Graham
I've been married 30 years and desperately wanted children but God did not choose to bless us with any. We looked into several kinds of adoption but either they did not work out or we decided not to continue with it. It has been painful feeling like a square in a world full of circles all these years but I have been able to deal with it. Now, my friends are all starting to have grandchildren so I get to go through another round of "babies" and know I will never have grandchildren either. I enjoy stamping and have a job and a wonderful husband. I do some scrapbooking, mainly of the children in our neighborhood that we've spent a-lot of time with and seen grow up or of our nieces and nephews. I did do one for my in-laws on their 50th wedding anniv.
The hardest part is that most women spend most of their time talking about their children or their children/grandchildren. Are there other "childless", married stampers who did want children out there?
Katy, that's exactly how I feel! I could've married at a couple points, but the men just weren't right, and I'd much rather stay single than marry the wrong man.
Just think of it this way, oh, single girls! We are Unclaimed Blessings!
My mom always told me that that's what she called herself 'til she got married, and I've claimed it for myself. :mrgreen:
Being single and without children does have its advantages. Yes, I've always wanted to be married and have children, but it hasn't happened for me and I wonder if it ever will. Some people say "when" I get married when I say "if" but I don't say "when". Only God knows what the future holds. I'm still hopeful, but we'll see as time goes on.
__________________ Michelle
�If I didn't have spiritual faith, I would be a pessimist. I've read the last page in the Bible. It's all going to turn out all right." - Billy Graham
Just think of it this way, oh, single girls! We are Unclaimed Blessings!
Hi, Michelle.
I agree we are blessings, but being 'unclaimed' makes it seem like we are all still waiting for someone to claim us. Many who are single would liike to get married someday and if that viewpoint helps, great!! But I feel we are already blessings to the people in our lives. Whether I marry or not, have children or not, the lives of my parents and brothers, etc would have been a lot different had I not been born. And that goes for all of us!
__________________ Cheryl "Mom" to Jazz & Cubby bungalowdays
Now I am so set in my ways that if I ever did find someone I wanted to live with, they woud have to live next door! I need my space and my alone time! I am ver happy with my life and every day that goes by someone reminds me how lucky I am!
This is me, too! I don't want anyone coming in and messing up my stuff! I'm 43, never been married and have no kids and never really had the feeling that I had to have kids.
For those of you who get asked when you are going to have kids, I had a friend who got asked that by her mother in law and she told her "you really want to know if we're having unprotected sex?" I always thought that was a great response.
I am divorced and I share custody of our son- who is a teenager so he doesn't want much attention. He perfers us (especially me- he thinks his dad is much cooler) to leave him alone. Alas- I have my stamping. I am also fertility-challenged so there will not be any other children for me even if I do find Mr. Wonderful and get married....although that's not looking so good right now either......so back to my stamps!!
Oh, but just to add a little sting to my "fertility-challenged" self- my ex-husband's NEW wife jsut went into labor with their first child together.....
Oh, but just to add a little sting to my "fertility-challenged" self- my ex-husband's NEW wife jsut went into labor with their first child together.....
OH that STINKS!!!! I'm sorry.....I would wish really bad things to happen...except that there is a new baby involved.
HOWEVER -- we could always wish for her to have a really long, painful labor :twisted: IF we were going to be vintictive....which we aren't:rolleyes:
For those of you who get asked when you are going to have kids, I had a friend who got asked that by her mother in law and she told her "you really want to know if we're having unprotected sex?" I always thought that was a great response.
I'm married 7.5 years with no kids and had to stop doing workshops for a while because it added to my depression about it so much. We're infertile and want kids but can't.
Everytime I meet someone new at a stamping event I get asked the kid question, then comes "How long have you been married?" when I say the whopping 7 years I get the "dammaged" look.
With those who know me it's become the joke that I can only make the cards I do because I don't have kids, which is so FALSE!
I actually started a support group in the forums for stampers who are infertile since there is no "oh you'll know what I mean when you have kids or pg" for us.
I'm with ya on the stamping world being dominated by Mom's with kids especialy scrappers. Sometimes a girl can feel lonely out there with no kid pages to share.
I know someone that was not able to have kids and they are about to adopt their 2nd child.
My mom always told me that that's what she called herself 'til she got married, and I've claimed it for myself. :mrgreen:
Being single and without children does have its advantages. Yes, I've always wanted to be married and have children, but it hasn't happened for me and I wonder if it ever will. Some people say "when" I get married when I say "if" but I don't say "when". Only God knows what the future holds. I'm still hopeful, but we'll see as time goes on.
Ah yes....that's what it all boils down to, isn't it? Being patient and waiting on God's timing, not ours. Sometimes it's hard -- but I can tell you -- I FOR ONE would much rather be single than married to the man I was engaged to last year. LOL!!!
am divorced and no kids at home does that count..lol.. they are all married or away at college and not moving back home...lol. i am bored and miss stamping so much and no one around to stamp with close to me.. its too dull in northern michigan... Teri
am divorced and no kids at home does that count..lol.. they are all married or away at college and not moving back home...lol. i am bored and miss stamping so much and no one around to stamp with close to me.. its too dull in northern michigan... Teri
Oh Ick, Teri!! Where in NO MI do you live? The UP? Are you close to Iron Mtn, MI? That's only about 2.5 hrs from me. You could come stamp here any time. AND I can be your adopted daughter.
