Naughty fortunes

[troopersma]

I want to make my boyfriend fortune cookies for Valentines day. I haven't decided yet if I'm going to do the real deal (found a recipe online) or if I'll do paper fortune cookies (which I've also seen online).

My bf works in construction and he's from Texas...so that info might be useful. Don't want rated 'x' stuff - but naughty double entendres are welcome. I know from experience that you guys will come through for me...that there are other twisted ladies out there.

Examples:

Confucius say he see "A happy ending" in your future.
Plan for many pleasures ahead.
A pleasant surprise is in store for you.

[susanvm]

A real fortune cookie I got read "A wise man knows many things. A screwd man knows many people". I suspect that screwd was a misprint for shrewd, but the effects of a girls night out dinner with friends resulted in all of us laughing hysterically at the apprapop misspelling.